Rescue Me.



























I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that place
Even your emotions have an echo
in so much space

And when you're out there
Without care,
Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn't because I didn't know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Probably

I feel so sad tonight, but I just can't figure out why. One of those days I guess.

Maybe its because lately it just seems like nothing can go the way I want it to. A brief encounter with a friend last night left me feeling more like a left-behind than an equal.

It's so hard to be friends with someone who gets everything that's asked for and has no idea what it feels like to be in my shoes.

It's not that I don't want to go to Western. Because I do. And its not that I don't want to live in London. Becasue I do.

But its so hard admitting that you failed. And its even harder to convince everyone else that I'm okay with it when I am really not.

And its even harder being the only one who gets left behind. I don't know one other person who didn't get what they wanted... besides me.

Everyone tells me that I have no reason to be sad and there is nothing to cry about. And that makes it so much worse. Suddenly it just feels like everyone is running away from me as fast as they can and I didn't even do anything wrong.

It was just grad school Laura. That's all it was. I'll just keep trying. Not everyone could get in. I knew my chances were slim. So I'm doing something else instead and somewhere inside all of this jumble-ness I am excited that at least I can be doing something.

Worse could happen. Much, much, MUCH worse.

We support the poor, and we support people who drink too much, we support people who do drugs and we feel bad for people who encounter too much death.

But I have never ever heard of a place where people like me, who are learning the hard way that life just really isn't fair - can go for a hug.