In My Place.

We've tried to wash our hands of all this
We never talk of our lacking relationships
And how we're guilt stricken sobbing with our
Heads on the floor
We fell through the ice when we tried not to
Slip, we'd say

I can't be held responsible
She was touching her face
And I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and
We'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen

I'm feeling a little more Frank Grimes than Paris Hilton today.

No, not this Frank Grimes:


Or this Frank Grimes:


And not this Frank Grimes:


Nor even this Frank Grimes:


This Frank Grimes:


Didn't you ever wonder if its possible to never feel jealous? To be so completely and utterly thrilled with your very own life that you never for a second contemplated what it would be like to be someone else.

To never once think that life is just not fair.

To never ever want something more than what you already have. And to never wonder if you will never get what you've always wanted.

To never have second thoughts, make second guesses or take a second look. To never wonder what anyone else is thinking or what someone else is doing while you do nothing. To always have something to say and a story to tell.

To never be sad because you're not the best, but be happy because you did the best for you. To never long for anything or think that just one more thing will make you happy.

To feel like you get everything that's coming to you and avoiding what comes without invitation.

To feel like you may actually be something to be jealous of.

I guess what im trying to say is that it still really hurts sometimes. And I cry about it, still, by myself. Because I don't want anyone to know how much it still hurts. And all I really want is tell someone and for someone to hurt with me.

Its so hard hurting by myself.